A blog about life in London

Useless Kilburn Shoplifters Haven’t Got A Clue

Useless Kilburn  Shoplifters Haven’t Got A Clue

London is the coolest city on the planet, but it is also one big cesspool full of shoplifters, lowlifes, criminals, layabouts and out right dodgy people from all over the world. I suppose it is the classic story of people thinking that the roads of London are paved with easy money.

As most decent, hardworking, honest, law abiding people realise, the only way to succeed in life and to make money is to work hard. I know it is just the way society has become, that a certain element of society, want and expect everything for free.

I live in Kilburn, which is what I would describe as being a up and coming and buzzing area of London, which is a wee bit rough around the edges, I suppose the hookers, the shoplifting , drug dealers and crazies that you see on the streets throughout the day and night are part and parcel of life in most areas of this crazy city called London.

I’m slowly but surly beginning to get use to the constant sound of police cars with their sirens blasting out, going up and down Kilburn High Road at all hours of the day. It truly amazes me, the different kinds of unmarked cars the cops are driving around in now a days, ranging from top of the range BMW’s to little VW Polo’s.

One thing that I have recently noticed, close up and personal in Kilburn and I know it is a major problem all over London, is the amount of shoplifting that is going on. In the last 4 days I have witnessed 3 shoplifters getting caught red handed and watched the events unfold from only a few feet away.

The first incident I witnessed was on Saturday, just as I was about to walk into my local newsagent on Kilburn High Road two black teenagers, were running out of the shop like bats of hell, chased by two Indian guys shouting at them. But the youths ran in front of bus, narrowly avoiding getting run over and made a successful escape. I hope the couple of quid worth of stuff that they shoplifted was worth it.

Incident number two believe it or not happened in my local Poundland store, Mr Rasta man filled up a his carrier bag and the side pockets of his cargo pants with stuff and attempted to walk out the store. But he wasn’t the most discreet and professional shoplifter the world has ever seen, and as a result the security guard had rumbled him and had been watching him for a long time.

Just as Mr Rasta man who was about 6″3″ thought he was about to escape with his £30 pounds worth of Poundland merchandise, he was stopped at the door by the 5″2″ and 5 stone security guard, who fortunately had the very tough and muscely looking manger helping him. Rasta man tried to force his way out and there was a bit of struggle between the manager and him, the security guard was doing his job, he was calling the cops!

An old Indian woman is telling me that he has stuff in his pockets and that I should go and help. I pretended I couldn’t understand English! It aint my stuff, and know one was getting hurt. Believe me if someone wants to take my stuff or rob someone in the street, I would be the first one to lend a willing hand and do whatever it takes to deal with the lowlife.

Rasta man was made to give back the items he had unsuccessfully tried to shoplift, and he casually walked down the road making the usual idle threats to the manager, who at one point looked like he was gonna beat the hell out of the useless Kilburn Shoplifter. I had to wonder what the hell use the midget security guard was, all he did was stand well back and hide behind the manager.

The third incident in 4 days that I had witnessed, happened today, just as I was sheltering from the rain with my African Princess in the doorway of Iceland. A customer at the checkout, told a member of staff that she had seen a guy putting stuff in his carrier bag and just at that moment, the shoplifter walked out of the shop and casually started walking down Kilburn High Road.

Just as Mr Shoplifter thought he had completed another cunning and daring piece of successful shoplifting, a young loon employee of Iceland who was about 18 years of age came bolting out of the shop and caught him. The next thing they are at the door way of Iceland and the useless shoplifter is demanding that the young loon takes the stuff out that he had stolen and to give him his carrier bag back again. This wasn’t gonna happen in a million years and the loon told him to come into the shop and they would sort it out.

Mr Shoplifter tried to struggle to get his stuff back, but he was easily pushed aside by the loon, and within a blink of an eye shoplifting guy was out of there. A  few minutes too late, 6 Iceland employees appeared and chased down the road after another useless Kilburn shoplifter. I know I shouldn’t laugh but it was like the united nations chasing after the shoplifter, there was a white guy, Indian guys, black guys and mixed race guy all in there red Iceland polo shirts, I just wish I had my camera on me.

What really amazes me is how useless these shoplifters were. You would think that they would try to be discreet and have a tiny bit of finesse about them, but not these ones. They can’t cant even be bothered to learn the necessary skills to shoplift properly, I suppose that sums them up as people!

I remember a few years ago, watching a master shop lifter in action in the GAP in Aberdeen. I was delivering something to the store on a Saturday morning at 9.05am. I was walking to the counter, when I looked over my shoulder and saw a guy picking up a pile of about 20 jumpers and just running out the store. I walked up to the counter and told the security guard who was, you guessed it chatting up the girls. He then ran out out of the shop after the master shoplifter, who was miles away by now.

This shoplifter had some skill, he waited till the coast was clear, he was wearing a baseball cap, he was a fast runner. In fact if it wasn’t for me telling the security guard what had happened, he wouldn’t have had a clue about it. I think if I was ever to become a shoplifter I would go and get a good looking girl accomplice, with a curvy body and short skirt and use her as a decoy, it would throw 99% of the security guards out there off the scent.

Whatever you do in life if you want to be good at it, you have to put the time and effort into your endeavours to become successful. . I personally think that the shoplifters I witnessed in Kilburn over the past few days, maybe need to go and find a job and start working for their money. Because they sure are useless shoplifters and they will hopefully end up behind bars if they carry on doing this crap.

One Comment

  1. These kids are nothing more than chancers, I have shoplifted all over London for the past 10 years and only been caught 5 times. Shoplifting is a dying art….