The Twilight World Of Seedy Soho In London

I was out and about in London on Sunday afternoon just wandering wherever my legs took me. I never had any specific destination, or place to go. I got off the tube at Baker Street, to see if Sherlock Holmes was kicking about, but he was out with Dr Watson trying to solve his latest case.

Since good old Sherlock Holmes was out, I took a wee stroll along to “The Regents Park” and walked around for a wee bit, but for some reason I wasn’t really in the mood for the park. I felt for a brief moment that I was in the Alfred Hitchcock movie The Brids, when suddenly about a hundred birds were flying above my head. An old woman that feeds them appeared and they must haven known lunch was on the way.

It was time to get out of there before I ended up covered in birds poo, if that had happened I would have had to head straight home. Anybody that has experienced having a bird crap on them, will know how much it stinks. Yuck!

I thought it would be a good idea to head to Oxford Street and do a little bit of early Christmas shopping for a change, instead of leaving everything to the last moment. I gave up on that idea after about 15 minutes of wandering around on the busiest street in London. It was too much to handle on a Sunday, I will return to brave the crowds another day.

There was only one thing to do, I  had to escape Oxford Street before the throngs of crazy blood thirsty shoppers really got on my fragile nerves. I noticed a street called Poland Street. I couldn’t believe it. I thought WTF, there are so many Polish people in London that they are now making them feel more at home by changing the streets names. I’m of course having a wee laugh.

My legs felt compelled to head down Poland Street and see where I ended up. After a few minutes of walking I ended up in Soho, which was once upon a time a seedy and vice ridden part of London. Soho has over the years underwent a transformation  and it is now  full of trendy bars, clubs, restaurants and shops.

The sleazy side of Soho London, is still there and very much out in the open. There are still a few sex shops, clip joints and porn shows that you would have to be blind not to see. The oldest profession in the world, prostitution is still openly in operation in Soho.

I put on my don’t talk to me look on my face. Which normally doesn’t let me down. I’m a friendly guy, most of the time, honest. But it let me down badly, I was twice asked by pimps if I was looking for girls, “No”. They didn’t bother me or try to persuade me that I needed to be looking for girls.

I had enough of Soho. I was trying to get my bearings so that I could get the hell out of there. When a couple of girls approached me, I was put slightly off guard, because they were so ugly there was no way they were going to be hookers. I thought they were looking for directions.

Ugly blonde girl  asks me if I’m a tourist, “No”. I could tell she thought I was lying. She then asks me if I’m looking for a girls, “No”. Then the even uglier darker skinned girl reassures me that they weren’t prostitutes, but they were like agents and they could get me any type or age of girl I wanted. I said, “No, I’m out of  here”. Blonde then changes track and says to me, “your not a cop are you”. She was of course having a laugh when do you ever see a cop walking around.

I had enough of these fools, it was clear they were up to no good. There were  quite a few low life’s hanging around, where the female pimps were at. Who were all either cock eyed or were taking a very close eye on me. I bid them fare well and told them to get a real job, instead of doing whatever shit it was they were up too.

Somehow I ended up on a street that I had heard of before, but wasn’t sure why I had heard of it. I was on Old Brompton Street, which I made a sharp exit from, it was wall to wall gay men. I was out there like a speeding bullet. Yikes!

Soho London even though it had a slight seedy and vice ridden tone to it, felt like a fairly safe place to be, even when it started to get dark. If you are looking for a seedy and vice ridden area, I would thoroughly recommend Aberdeen’s red light district!

I had just finished wandering around London’s China Town, when I noticed the two female pimps who had now been joined by a third one, who were walking along the road with an obvious tourist. I thought it would be fun to follow them, to see what was happening. That is of course another story…..!

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